Packing old memories

Packing up my home is far more painful than I could have imagined.

Packing up 10 years of memories is what I’m really struggling with – the photos of our various holidays, the box full of wedding memories, photos of our honeymoon, mugs we have collected from our travels, all the wedding presents we were given – it sucks….big time!!!

It’s also playing with my emotions towards him….seeing him crying as we decide what he should take and what I should take, knowing he has nowhere to live yet, just breaks my heart….which is crazy, I know it is, you don’t have to tell me!!

I’m trying to separate the two issues and not let my emotions about leaving my home play with my feelings towards him.

I’ve been staying at my parents’ (my childhood home) whilst I move my stuff back and to, and I already feel homesick, for both home and husband!

Even though it’s my childhood home, where I lived for 20 years, moving a house full of stuff into a garage and one bedroom is a struggle and I hate that I have to impose on my parents and turn their house upside down.

Only another 3 days of packing and moving until the house belongs to someone else. My first house, our marital home will be but a memory packed up into boxes.

I hope it gets easier because right now I feel in a very dark, sad and lonely place!

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8 thoughts on “Packing old memories

  1. newstart14 says:

    I found it became easier with time. I had an initial high of packing, then a lot of lows – sadness / fear / a sense of loss / sorrow for him / remembering why we fell in love. It was rough but eventually I just tried to ‘be’ in each emotion and accept that something horrible had happened to me. Once I stopped fighting it I found it easier to let it all go because ultimately I wanted to return to the high and I have. Now, though I think it’s just a peacefulness that I am living in the now and it’s a good place to be. I hope you find it because you sound like a strong, lovely lady x

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    • Thank you, I’m trying not to fight the emotions, and live them as you say. Everything I own carries so many different memories it’s such a difficult process to go through isn’t it?! Exactly as you describe, sorrow, loss, sadness. Arrghhhh hope it gets better soon! xx

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      • newstart14 says:

        I think it’s a terribly emotive process and one of the hidden ‘side effects’ of infidelity that you don’t think off … However I think it does get better and in a strange way having taken my time I feel like it’s helped me say good bye to the past as I have gone through every single box / item and said good bye to what I don’t need and what I associate with sorrow … Stay strong and believe your future will be brighter because I bet it will xx

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      • newstart14 says:

        I hope that you have had an ok day and have some time to let yourself real with whatever feelings come up. Wishing you lots of love and strength x

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      • Thank you. It’s been a horribly sad day. Both H and I just sobbed and sobbed as we stood in our empty shell of a house. I feel so empty having left it behind knowing I will never set foot in there again.
        I’m also feeling so mixed up about my feelings towards H. But I want to ensure it’s not because of the trauma of moving home.
        Thanks for your support x

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  2. Sending hugs your way. I can understand exactly how you feel altho I for one can’t wait to pack up this house and move somewhere new. We came here with such high hopes but they were thrown away for a shag with a pit faced whore.

    I hope you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and that your move will at least shed enough light to help you choose the next path to take! xx

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    • Thank you. I feel I’m not getting clarity around my true feelings for H because of the trauma of leaving my home!

      And why does everything I own have to carry a memory of our happy time together??!! Argghhhh its sending me crazy!!! xx

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